Mandalay

Mandalay. For some reason that word was all I could think of today. Probably because it brings imageries of serene, exotic place to escape to. On the background, Nicola Hitchcock’s dreamy voice fills in the atmosphere and you would be immersed with an overwhelming sense of tranquility.

Mandalay perhaps is a strange, or maybe uncommon getaway place of choice, given its geographical coordinates not even remotely close to the coast, hence lacking the postcard perfect landscape of white sandy beaches and palm trees so often associated with serenity.

White sand dunes and warm afternoon sunshine, after all, are what I am after here thinking in the office, being ill, coughing my brain out, and unable to focus on what I am supposed to be working on. There is an irony in this situation, given that I have just gone back from a trip to a beach on the NSW coast for the weekend; but I was restless and I could not say that it was relaxing. And yet, all the weekend activities coming my way are physical and involve adrenaline rush of some sort. Not quite the Mandalay that I have in mind.

I have come to the stage where I need to weigh my options cautiously, especially knowing that what had happened cannot be undone, yet there is always the pressure to do more. The truth is, knowing your priority is a hard exercise at all levels. There are, of course, the financial consideration and the time constraint. Physical fitness comes in next; following that, motivation and impulse. Jealousy, as it happens, also plays a big part in my decision making, especially when you know that your circle of friends are having fun—surely you don’t want to feel left out? 

I just need to find out which of the Mandalays there that I would like to grab, and enjoy that as much as I can before it’s all over.

Reality Bites

I just found out that a casual coworker of mine, also an undergraduate, who is supposed to go back working for the company in November after her study leave of several months, might not be able to do just that because everyone just realised that her salary has not been budgeted. Sure, they are still trying to work on the budget to see if they can squeeze her salary somewhere, but of course there is no guarantee of a happy ending, and it might also mean someone else’s (i.e. mine) reserved salary should be cut for the next year.

My work contract ends in December, and although we verbally agreed that my contract is going to be extended until June next year, last week my boss confirmed to me that my extension status has yet to be determined. Why? Again, cost issue. I found it to be unsettling having this level of uncertainty for a period of time not too far ahead of you.

It dawned to me that the end my period living in Sydney might come to an end sooner than what I have realised. December is only 4 months away. And I still haven’t got a clue on what I wil do, or even where will I be, in January. I have come to love the city that I live in now, even the routine does not bother me as much anymore. But I guess all good things must come to an end.

At times like this when you realise how reality bites, you are forced stick your feet on the ground and expect for the worst, and try your best to pretend that you’re not really hoping for the best (though of course you do). I have a strong feeling that the next few months will be an emotional roller coaster for me; let’s see how I would cope with that.